2-12-2025 4:03am

What I Learned About Love

Lesley Misko Editor

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Love is in the air these days. Many have offered thoughts about this powerful emotion. This week, several of our readers share their thoughts in a series of guest essays.]

by Chris Karver

I grew up in the 50’s and 60’s. I was introduced to the concept of “Love” by two Disney classic films popular during that time: "Snow White" and "Cinderella." These movies all had one thing in common: the prince (and it had to be a prince who’s handsome and rich), comes to the beautiful girl’s rescue and sweeps her off her feet. And of course they live happily ever after. The End.

Now in my mature years I’m looking back on my two role models for defining love and discovered what I missed with each film. Yes, there’s love throughout both movies, but love comes in different forms and in different ways.

Let’s start with Snow White. Snow suffered the loss of her parents and was left to the guardianship of the wicked Queen who only was concerned about her beauty. To the Queen, Love was all about looks and power. Poor innocent Snow became more beautiful than the Queen and was given a death sentence.

Left in the forest by the hunter, Snow became acquainted with the Seven Dwarfs (who by the way were far from handsome). Their relationship became one of protecting her while she cared for them in terms of how a sister and brothers would care for each other. They formed a bond of Love. The bond was so strong that they all would die for her, as she would for them.

We all know that the Queen gave Snow the poison apple and she fell into a death sleep. It was the Dwarfs who found the handsome prince who then kissed her, thus waking her up so she could live happily ever after. A prince who hardly knew Snow kisses her and this is true Love? I don’t think so. The true Love here is the Dwarfs knowing that once Snow wakes up, she’ll go away with the prince and they may never be with her again. Here Love means sacrificing what is best for oneself as long as the person you love gets to live their dream.

Regarding Cinderella, again she lost her parents and was left to the guardianship of her evil stepmother. Despite the cruel treatment by the stepmother and her two evil stepsisters, Cinderella is still singing, holding her head high, and she develops a loving relationship with the birds and mice.

Denied the chance of going to the Royal Ball due to the destruction of her mother’s gown by the evil threesome, she breaks down sobbing. Who comes to the rescue but Cinderella’s fairy godmother. Cinderella goes to the ball in a magical gown with glass slippers. She dances with the handsome prince. The clock strikes twelve and she runs away losing one of her glass slippers.

The prince vows to marry the girl who fits into the glass slipper. He’s going to marry a girl who lost her shoe. It was the birds and mice who get the attention of the prince who finds Cinderella and the rest is history. Here again Cinderella, who only met the prince once, is swept away to a life everlasting. Is this Love? I think not. It was the relationship with the birds and mice that brought Cinderella joy and companionship. Cinderella learned Love through nature, not a prince.

I’ve learned that Love doesn’t involve a handsome prince. It comes in the form of bonds. This could be bonds between a significant other or between family or friends. Whoever the bond is with, it’s putting the needs of others in front of the needs and wants of oneself.

Bibbidi- Bobbidi-Boo!

Chris Karver grew up in Warminster, Bucks County and is a graduate of William Tennent High School and Villanova University. Life circumstances brought her to Boyertown where she was a Social Studies teacher at Boyertown Area Sr. High School since 1982. At BASH, Chris was also Student Council Advisor for 20 years and a member of the MOMs (a group of eight beautiful women from BASH who “Made Others Matter” by helping staff members in need). A Boyertown resident, Chris has two children: Becky, wife of Rob Rowe, and John; as well as two grandchildren. Since retirement, Chris has been active in serving the Boyertown area as a member of the Junior Woman’s Club of Boyertown, and a member of the Board of Directors of the Boyertown Ambulance Community Service. She also helps with Meals on Wheels. Service is an important part of Chris’s character.